To the nice girls who are overlooked, who become friends and nothing more, who spend hours fixating upon their looks and their personalities and their actions because it must be they that are doing something wrong.

This is for the girls who don't give it up on the first date, who don't want to play mind games, who provide a comforting hug and a supportive audience for a story they've heard a thousand times.

This is for the girls who understand that they aren't perfect and that the guys they're interested in aren't either, for the girls who flirt and laugh and worry and obsess over the slightest glance, whisper, touch, because somehow they are able to keep alive that hope that maybe... maybe this time he'll have understood.

This is an homage to the girls who laugh loud and often, who are comfortable in skirts and sweats and combat boots, who care more than they should for guys who don't deserve their attention.

This is for those girls who have been in the trenches, who have watched other girls time and time again fake up and make up and f*** up the guys in their lives without saying a word.

This is for the girls who have been there from the beginning and have heard the trite words of advice, from "there are plenty of fish in the sea," to "time heals all wounds."

This is to honor those girls who know that guys are just as scared as they are, who know that they deserve better, who are seeking to find it.

This is for the girls who have never been in love, but know that it's an experience that they don't want to miss out on.

For the girls who have sought a night with friends and been greeted by a night of catcalling, rude comments and explicit invitations that they'd rather not have experienced.

This is for the girls who have spent their weekends sitting on the sidelines of a beer pong tournament or a case race, or playing Florence Nightingale for a vomiting guy friend or a comatose crush, who have received a drunk phone call just before dawn from someone who doesn't care enough to invite them over but is still willing to pass out in their bed.

This is for the girls who have left sad song lyrics in their away messages, who have tried to make someone understand through a subliminally appearing profile, who have time and time again dropped their male friend hint after hint after hint only to watch him chase after the first blonde girl in a skirt.

This is for the girls who have been told that they're too good or too smart or too pretty, who have been given compliments as a way of breaking off a relationship, who have ever been told they are only wanted as a friend.

This one's for the girls who you can take home to mum, but won't because it's easier to sleep with a whore than foster a relationship.

This is for the girls who have been led on by words and kisses and touches, all of which were either only true for the moment, or never real to begin with.

This is for the girls who have allowed a guy into their head and heart and bed, only to discover that he's just not ready, he's just not over her, he's just not looking to be tied down.

This is for the girls who believe the excuses because it's easier to believe that it's not that they don't want you, it's that they don't want anyone.

This is for the girls who have had their hearts broken and their hopes dashed by someone too cavalier to have cared in the first place; this is for the nights spent dissecting every word and syllable and inflection in his speech, for the nights when you've returned home alone, for the nights when you've seen from across the room him leaning a little too close, or standing a little too near, or talking a little too softly for the girl he's with to be a random hookup.

This is for the girls who have endured party after party in his presence, finally having realized that it wasn't that he didn't want a relationship: it was that he didn't want you. I honor you for the night his dog died or his grandmother died or his little brother crashed his car and you held him, thinking that if you only comforted him just right, or said the right words, or rubbed his back in the right way then perhaps he'd realize what it was that he already had.

This is for the night you realized that it would never happen, and the sunrise you saw the next morning after failing to sleep. This is for the "I really like you, so let's still be friends" comment after you read more into a situation than he ever intended; this is for never realizing that when you choose friends, you seldom choose those which make you cry yourself to sleep.

This is for the hugs you've received from your female friends, for the nights they've reassured you that you are beautiful and intelligent and amazing and loyal and truly worthy of a great guy.

This is for the despair you all felt as you sat in the aftermath of your tears, knowing that that night the only companionship you'd have was with a pillow and your teddy bear.

This is for the girls who have been used and abused, who have endured what he was giving because at least he was giving something; this is for the stupidity of the nights we've believed that something was better than nothing, though his something was nothing we'd have ever wanted.

This is for the girls who have been satisified with too little and who have learned never to expect anything more: for the girls who don't think that they deserve more, because they've been conditioned for so long to accept the scraps thrown to them by guys.

This is what I don't understand. Men sit and question and whine that girls are only attracted to the mean guys, the guys who berate them and belittle them and don't appreciate them and don't want them; who use them for sex and think of little else than where their next conquest will be made.

Men complain that they never meet nice girls, girls who are genuinely interested and compelling, who are intelligent and sweet and smart and beautiful; men despair that no good women want to share in their lives, that girls play mindgames, that girls love to keep them hanging.

Yet, men, I ask you: were you to meet one of these genuinely interested, thrillingly compelling, interesting and intelligent and sweet and beautiful and smart girls, were you to give her your number and wait for her to call... and if you were to receive a call from her the next day and she, in her truthful, loyal, intelligent and straightforward nice girl fashion, were to tell you that she finds you intriguing and attractive and interesting and worth her time and perhaps material from which she could fashion a boyfriend, would you or would you not immediately call your friends to tell them of the "stalker chick" you'd met the night prior, who called you and wore her heart on her sleeve and told the truth?

And would you, or would you not, refuse to make plans with her, speak with her, see her again, and once again return to the bar or club or party scene and search once more for this "nice girl" who you just cannot seem to find? Because therein lies the truth, guys: we nice girls are everywhere. But you're not looking for a nice girl. You're not looking for someone genuinely interested in your intermural basketball game, or your anatomy midterm grade, or that argument you keep having with your father; you're looking for a quick fix, a night when you can pretend to have a connection with another human being which is just as disposable as the condom you were using during it.

So don't say you're on the lookout for nice girls, guys, when you pass us up on every step you take. Sometimes we go undercover; sometimes we go in disguise: sometimes when that girl in the low cut shirt or the too tight miniskirt won't answer your catcalls, sometimes you're looking at a nice girl in whore's clothing. We might say we like the attention, we might blush and giggle and turn back to our friends, but we're all thinking the same thing: "This isn't me. Tomorrow morning, I'll be wearing a teeshirt and flannel shorts, I'll have slept alone and I'll be making my hungover best friend breakfast. See through the disguise. See me." You never do. Why? Because you only see the exterior, you only see the whorey girl who welcomes those advances.

You don't want the nice girl.. so don't say you're looking for a relationship: relationships take time and energy and intent, three things we're willing to extend, but in return, we're looking for compassion and loyalty and trust, three things you never seem willing to express.

Maybe nice guys finish last, but in the race they're running they're chasing after the whores and the sluts and the easy-targets... the nice girls are waiting at the finish line with water and towels and a congratulatory hug (and yes, if she's a nice girl and she likes you, the sweatiness probably won't matter), hoping against hope that maybe you'll realize that they're the ones that you want at the end of that silly race.

So maybe it won't last forever. Maybe some of those guys in that race will turn in their running shoes and make their way to the concession stand where we're waiting; however, until that happens, we still have each other, that silly race to watch, and all the chocolate we can eat (because what's a concession stand at a race without some chocolate?)

Author is unknown but I loved this piece so much that I gotta post it here. I think somehow or another, every girl would have experienced something from this post.

I think my boyfriend is a nice guy. :D
I think I'm a nice girl too, no? HAHA.

HAHAHAHAHA IPHOTO SAYS I LOOK LIKE ERIKO!!!! It detected her face as me!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!

Okay too lame! But I'm really excited what! Eriko leh!!!!! I know I don't look like lah but this makes me happy. HAHAHHA

First post of the year! HAHAHA. That took me quiteeeeee long though!

Really hate RMIT visits!!!! ): Cos they arrange till our timetable is so packed for these 2 weeks. 7 lectures in 4 days!!!! ): and 2 days of 4-hour breaks. How niceeeeee. ):

Yay one of the days I look forward to so much is here!! Wednesday night!!!!! I like Wednesday nights cos I get to meet Baby during his nights out. :D and of course because of Mambo! But sadly I can't go for quite long cos my Thursday classes has to start at 8.30am of all times. ):

I survived on 3 hours of sleep last night! I better get running if not I will just die again tomorrow!

Just came back from the last Mambo of the year! All my favourite songs came out today! My life is complete HAHA okay actually not really. Zouk is bloody crowded today! So crowded till they refuse entry! Luckily I reached like 5mins before they started refusing entry. OMG. And because it's SOOOOOOOOOOO crowded, I stood on the podium. For.The.First.Time.In.My.Life. LOL. Quite a fun experience I guess cos there's unlimited space for me to do the actions :D Now I know why Baby and friends love to stand on the podium HAHA.

BTW I really hate sweaty and sticky guys in clubs! They're so gross dripping with sweat all over and they always bump into me!! GROSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!

In another 18 hours it'll be 2010! Guess that means I'm turning 21 soon. WTH OMG SO OLD PLS. Can I stay forever 21? People always say once you hit 21, your years just fly by like nobody's business. NOOOOOOOOOOO that can't happen!!!! ):

This year has been a really great one. Graduated from the shitass course, got myself into a uni, took on loads of jobs earning quite alot of money but wondering where it all went (japan trip? =\ ), meeting all my crazy friends, mambo which is awesome healthy clubbing hahaha, and what else! Shit my memory fail big time la ): Oh Oh. Highlight of the year is to go to Japan with friends! Need another getaway soon. 

My awesome friends!





Glad that bff Pink Bunny is always around to listen to my shit and love the people I love with me and hate the people I hate with me. Love you so much bestie!!!! Not missing out on Emogirl89 although we talk very little I still love her alot hehe. And last but not least, I heart Hobo-kid! He's the most A-S-S-H-O-L-E person on earth but we all still love him! HAHA. (Shit, the four of us haven't taken a photo together since 2006. OMG)





Glad that Vicks is someone I can always talk to! And Nicgreenshark, Japan photo kaki leh! Must go on more shoots lah! HAHAHA. Jassymoleyholey, we talk more frequently recently and that's awesome! K soon together (let's force Vicks to sing chinese songs hahahah).





Glad that Piggaye is always around too although we quarrel sometimes but its mad awesome having a sister as cool as her hehe. We can talk on and on for HOURS and we still have endless to say and mum will always come over and join in on all the gossip! Love mum loaddddddddsssss too. Most amazing mum on earth love her!



Glad to have PPPPP cos outings with them always make me really happy! Crazy people like Jon, David, Jiajun and Baowen makes all the outings X100000000 funnier and crazier. That doesn't mean the rest of PPPPP isn't important! PPPPP always will be 21 people: Ronnie, Ore, Farid, Baowen, Jiajun, Alex, David, Jonathan, Kenneth, Zixiang, Shane, Weijie, Eve, Vicks, Nicole, Jaei, Peggy, Xing, Beckie, Sonia and me :D





Glad to have Teletubbies girls and a Noo-Noo vacuum cleaner who are around to chiong for projects and exams together! Still got a few years to go let's CHIONG AH!!!! :D










Glad to still have all my secondary school friends organising all the meetups if not I wouldn't have chance to catch up with you all! Xinku dajia le!!! :D Glad to have met so many of you all this year! Emmeline, Tze Yin, Gongs, Jerlyn, Ahma, Huiyen, Jean, Wanru, Valerie, Zihui, Majella, Alicia, Sharon! Didn't meet Christabel, Pamela and Pigeon this year omg!! ): Meet up soon okay!



Last but not least, glad to have YOU with me through all our happy times, sad times, bored times, fun times, all the time. HEHE. Thank you for making so much effort in this relationship. I know you do! It's been a really awesome one year two months and five days with you. Although we piss each other off sometimes, we still compromise and solve problems together and that's mad awesome. :D Love you sooooooo much :D

Again this year, new people came into my life, and one out of my life. It's like a trend, I lose friends every year. But that's okay, cos the people whom I matter to will always be in my life and if I don't matter to them maybe that's cos I failed as a friend. That's okay too, cos there will definitely be some people in this world who really appreciates my friendship. And I'm glad I know who they are. :D

Bless you all with all the good things in life, and an awesome 2010. :D

P.S Not looking forward to my 21st birthday because it's near my exams. F that. ):

Awesome time I had for the past 2 weeks. Everyday was awesome cos I had Baby (only not on one day out of his 13-day block leave). Now I'm back to square-one, that is, only probably having him on the weekends even though it's 8-5 for now and we can't meet so frequently anymore. ):

On a brighter note, Christmas is coming! Looking forward to it cos there's logcake, meeting of friends, working on Christmas Day (don't say I emo-kid. got double pay leh!), and loads of yummy food and presents!! :D I'm a happy girl hehe.

Days with the boyfriend:



Long long time ago we went flyer, cos there was student price! :D


Baby's last mambo before he enlists.


At Sentosa playing ridiculous rides and taking pictures :D



Good food after a long long time!


My lamb shank


His steak with cheesy sauce


Squid ink pasta with prawns





Sukiyaki/kimchi steamboat! Love the sukiyaki soup base sooooo much.





Cycling!














Zoukout


Escargots. Yummy!!


Hamburger steak


Omu rice with cream sauce


Squid ink pasta. Totally recommended!!





Last mambo (again) for block leave


Photoshoot with Ps at Punggol


BBQ at Shawn's place

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Had one of the most awesome jobs yesterday!
Stuff I had to do was just to iron clothes for the models and help the models change during the fashion show for the Fall/Winter collection from Escada. Loved this longgggg flowy dress that the korean model I was in charge of was wearing! Really mega pretty. And models seriously buay paiseh one, they just STRIP in front of everyone. Including their bras. O.O

And Allan Wu was the host! He's damn good looking and fit lah and super friendly! Goddammit I didn't take a photo with him ):

The event was at this new hotel in Sentosa called Cappella Singapore. Awesome place, awesome ambience! I wanna stay there!!! The cheapest room is $550!!! WTF? And the most ex room is $12000!!!!! WTF!!!!!!!!!!!

YAY gonna meet Majelly, Ally and Sharony later!!! Haven't seen them in mega long! Yay!!!!!!!

My life is super happening recently. I'm going out everyday. Awesomeeeeeeee :D

But ultimately I can't wait to go out with Baby! Ages since we went on a date together. ): Hope Baby doesn't get confined. Pray with me okay? Last weekend liao then POC then BLOCK LEAVE YAY!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Sitex '09

Thanks to all you crazy ass people for making it so fun for the past four days despite most of us having shitty sales... HAHA. Looking forward to working with all of you again in future! :D

P.S I think I don't know half of the people's names in the above photo. LOL






























Lol charcoal mask!

And thanks Baby for fetching me on 2 nights :D and accompanying me for lunch on another day. :D Love you very very much! :D

I have a friend, she used to always say she will never exchange our friendship for anything else and look what happened now?
I have a friend, who hasn't met me since my birthday cos I think she can't be bothered asking?
I have a friend, who hasn't had lunch with me in school for more than half a year before I graduated.
I have a friend, who always end up not meeting me even though we planned to meet ages ago.
I have a friend, who tells me lies.
I have a friend, who became materialistic.
I have a friend, who cares about nobody but the person who makes her feel very different.
I have a friend, whom I can't believe anymore.

So why the hell did I treat her so well when all I got was shit in the end?

I spent a long time thinking over things that happened over these years. Beginning, yes, you regarded me as your best friend. But things changed when you got together with the guy who makes you feel very different. You are no longer the person I used to know. Why is it that whenever you asked me for something and I always obliged but you never did the same? Why is it that you always have some stupid reason to tell me for the times you failed to turn up?

I don't think I can believe you anymore.

You know who you are and I know you'll be reading this. Honestly I don't care anymore whether you are bothered or angry by me writing this entry, and I don't care if anyone can recognize you through this entry. And I don't think we can ever be back to even normal friends anymore cos I'm just so sick of everything.

I hate people who tell me 'friends forever' cos it never happens to me anyway. Amazingly those people who have never told me that are still my awesome friends. 'Forever' is like some cursed word or something and I hate it.

P.S this should have been up the very night that I found out lovef*cksshit was gone.

This week is Baby's field camp. But guess what! He's allowed to return to the bunk at night to shower and sleep! Which means we can talk at night! Very very awesome :D

I wanna get a better job. Working at RL is pissing me off. I don't like that place at all. It's so devoid of true emotions.

Guess that's what it's like in the real working world.......

It's the holidays! Going out with my teletubbies girls later for steamboat and some well-deserved shopping! How awesome. :D

Time to pack my room again! It looks like a total warzone after exams and my wardrobe is in a massive mess! OMG!!

Time to change blogskin soon too! I've been using this BoA one for around a year I guess? HAHA.

Time to start exercising! Baby's giving me 2 months to slim down. OMG I must achieve that goal! HAHAHAHAHA.

Less than a day and I'm missing Baby again. ):

From a friend that I trusted completely, to seemingly a stranger whom I don't know anymore.

Welcome, Shaomin, to the real world of people.
Who to trust, who not to.
It just seems so clear now.